OLD ROGER-LIKE ANGER

Old Roger is dead & gone to his grave

Um hal Gone to his grave

They planted an apple tree over his head

Um hal Over his head

The apple grew ripe & ready to fall

Um hal Ready to fall

There came a high wind & blew them all off

Um ha! Blew them all off

There came an old woman to pick them all up

Um hal Pick them all up

Old Roger got up & gave her a knock

Um hal Gave her a knock

That made the old woman go hipperty-hop

Um ha! hipperty-hop. (By: Roger McGough)

How God took my mind back to ‘OLD ROGER‘ about four years ago while I was doing a series of teachings on unresolved anger during our SCHOOL OF MARRIAGE sessions in church leaves me stunned: I wouldn’t have in a million years connected this poem spiritually to issues of anger if not for the Holy Spirit.

I knew this poem in the 60’s when I was in primary school. One of the greatest lessons about this poem was the picture that wholly described the scenario. There was the picture of the apple tree having some apples on it, while some were already fallen to the ground. One could also see the effect of the wind on the tree as the leaves were being blown off. Then there goes the picture of the supposedly dead and gone (buried) Old Roger, rising up from his grave (hmm!) and giving the poor old woman a costly knock, with the old woman jumping off in a scary manner.

God enabled me to use this poem to describe the emotional and the spiritual state of those who failed to truly lay their anger to rest. These are people who secretly brew anger in the form of bitterness away from the consciousness of those around them; they later plan to launch out a reprisal attack when their offenders are off guard. These kinds of people also find it easy to transfer their aggression to the unlucky persons and innocent ones who happen to step on their toes while their anger is secretly stewing.

Unresolved Anger

Linking the above poem to Marriage, we don’t need anybody to tell us much about the devastating effects of unresolved Anger in many homes. Many couples have had their marriages torn apart with unfinished anger. Unresolved anger is the only anger that develops underneath as a terrorist, and waiting to rise up and strike back at the slightest provocation, just like ‘Old Roger‘. In order to prevent Old Roger’s anger from resurrecting, a good bible slab (Word of God), MUST be carefully laid on it.

I have taken time to carefully observe, that crises which tend to divide marriages usually surface more among couples whose marriages are very young (between one and eleven years), and the children are still small. When minor crises start early and are not properly resolved, they are repackaged inside the minds like small dynamites. And as time goes on, if the couples don’t understand the ‘heavenmatics’ of harnessing their incompatibility, they would end up blowing their anger fuse. And by the time all the fuses are blown over a period of time, their emotional, physical and spiritual lives are shredded in pieces. These are no doubts the results of someone letting the sun go down upon his or her anger.

The GWT (God’s Word Translation) warns, “Don’t go to bed angry” (Eph. 4:27). Many people who treat anger this way could find themselves waking up on the wrong side like “Old Roger”, ready for an unpredictable mission. (See incident #3, pg. 58)

ANGER IN MY GROWING YEARS AS A BELIEVER

Incident #24: With A Friend And With My
First Mentor-Dr. John Akpami

Many years ago, just few months after I had given my life to Christ in 1981, I had a serious quarrel with a friend which resulted in “to your tents o Israel”. And I had no other person to talk this over with other than the one who led me to Christ, and who also was my mentor-Dr John Esuga Akpami. He was undergoing the mandatory youth service (National Youth Service Corps) scheme as a medical doctor in Yaba College Of Technology. I had then just finished my OND, (Ordinary National Diploma) in Civil Engineering. I consulted him for medical attention, but got Jesus instead (on Friday, the 23rd of October, 1981).

I walked up to him and therefore narrated all that happened between me and this other sister who was also his convert, but wasn’t happy at all with him the way he treated the matter.

Have you ever complained in anger about the issues between you and your partner or friend to someone and you poured forth everything that person did, all in bid to make the counselor see all the wrong deeds of your partner in order to pass a judgment? (Proverbs 18:17). Anyway, God had since taught me not to be quick to judge the one who is not present.

Dr John Akpami was not that person who would quickly pass a judgment. So, I was surprised to see him look at me without saying a word after he had patiently waited until I had ran out of words. I asked him, ‘Brother John, I just told you what somebody did and you are not saying anything’. The first thing he said was, ‘What do you want me to say?”

I Blew It

While I was boiling in anger, he was calmly seated. Believe me, the only thing he said was, ‘What do you want me to say?’ When I heard this, it really got to me and I raised my voice in reaction and retorted, ‘So you mean you are not going to say anything after I had told you what she did?’
He relaxed in his chair as usual and was looking at me.

Your guess is as good as mine! I got up in anger, (I can’t remember if I hissed) and walked towards the door, opened the door and left him a message of anger and hurt, as I slammed the door behind me. As soon as I came out of his office and was walking away, thousands of thoughts like machine gun bullets bombarded my mind, and they followed these pattern: